This is a musical post, guys! Listen while you read!
I am quite sure Rufus wrote this song about when I met my husband Ethan. 3 years ago February 15th I met Ethan at a respectable dive and my life has never been the same. I was at Portland's famed Great Lost Bear enjoying some beers with my friend. It was a 'last hurrah' of sorts; I was preparing to give up alcohol for Lent (GASP!) that year and wanted a few last tasty beers. My husband tells the story that he was checking out my friend first because he couldn't see me at the other end of the bar. I tease him about it; I playfully pout that he was into her first, but he always makes me feel better by saying he was totally wowed when I came into view. I had originally been sitting next to these three d-bags who just came from work and had grimy fingernails and grimy clothes and grimy attitudes. At least they were good for a chuckle. Linds went out to have a smoke with a girl from Ethan's end of the bar. In an attempt to escape the d-bags I made my way to the other side of the bar to wait for my friend. I sat down next to Ethan. Prepare for a cliche: the rest is history.
Pretty much from that night on we saw each other every day. I knew that night that I was more than smitten. I was never a believer in love at first sight but I'll tell you what, I am now. We talked for hours that night at the bar and after. Yes, I did give him a ride home that night. No, we didn't "do anything." He did however ask permission to kiss me (adorable, right?) and I said yes and we kissed on the street corner like something out of a winter-set romcom. Two weeks later, I moved into his bachelor pad. Crazy, right? Most people thought so. But I was alone, my lease was up in Kennebunk, he lived closer to work and we were pretty much in love. If it didn't work, I was no worse off than I had been post-divorce. All I owned was clothing, books and a car. People said we were crazy. We knew better.
So here we are, 3 years later, married (our first wedding anniversary is coming in April) and amazingly happy. There's more to our story, like telling my dad I met an older man and he actually using the phrase "sugar daddy," me reassuring him that 10 years older didn't count as a sugar daddy, Ethan and I going on weekends away and meeting each others' friends and family, etc. But what I really want to talk about is love. I'd been in love before this. Hell, I'd been married before meeting Ethan. The kind of love and marriage I am experiencing now is nothing like what I had before, and in the best ways. My previous relationship, marriage and divorce taught me a lot about myself and what I need from a relationship. It wasn't all bad, but it was a young, carefree kind of love when it started. And we matured while the love didn't. So suffice it to say that I've never known love like I have with Ethan. I think every kind of love is different, every person we love, we love differently. But this is the kind of fills you up from head to toes, butterflies in the tummy (yup, even 3 years later) hard work/great reward kind of love.
|From our post wedding shoot. Courtesy Erin Kroll Photo|
One of the best parts of our love story is that Ethan and I weren't looking for each other. We found each other. I had been "single and loving it" (wootwoot) and had 'sworn off men for a while.' I had planned to move away and attend grad school to[insert 'find myself' cliches here]. And then BAM. Like a ton of bricks. When I stopped looking for great love, I found it. In an older, amazing, smart, sexy, charming man, in a respectable dive, on a somewhat safe street. Our marriage isn't always sunshine and rainbows. We have our disagreements (mostly political) and our struggles, but we rarely fight. I still get giddy when I see him, and I'd rather lay around our house in my jammies with him than do almost anything else. I went to FL for a week for work. It was the longest we'd been apart since the day we met (no joke). Thank God for FaceTime. People say this is the 'newlywed phase.' That someday the fire will fade a bit. I know what that feels like, it happened the first time I was married. Almost like a switch turning off. That hasn't happened for Ethan and I. I'm quite certain it never will.
Happy three years, my darling husband. Happy early first wedding anniversary. I look forward to so many more firsts with you; houses and children and puppies. You have changed my life. I am lucky to have you. I love you completely and passionately.
|From our honeymoon at Ocean Park Beach. This sums up our life accurately|